Siobhan Kukolic

Words to inspire the belief that we have all we need to be the change we wish to see.

Tag: Happiness

Our real, messy, imperfect experience

Martha Beck, sociologist and life coach, said, “Relinquishing the delusional hope that we can or must be flawless — allows us to seek happiness in the only place it can be found:  our real, messy, imperfect experience.” Continue reading

Success and happiness are not individual sports

In Sean Achor’s new book, Big Potential, he talks about how success and happiness are not individual sports but team efforts.  He mentions an American biologist, Professor Hugh Smith, who was travelling through a Southeast Asian jungle in 1935.  Suddenly, surrounded by night sky, the professor saw a mangrove tree along the river completely light up and then go dark.  And it happened again a few seconds later.  Next all the trees along the river embankment lit up and went dark together.  After his initial shock wore off, he realized that the trees were covered in lightning bugs who were flashing their light in unison.   Continue reading

Happiness comes before success

I’m reading The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor.  If you haven’t watched his TED Talk, it’s a must.  He reminds us through years of research he did while at Harvard that happiness comes before success.  Not the other way around.

So many of us think we will be happy when we meet that special someone, graduate, get a job, earn a promotion, buy a house, have children or lose weight. But research shows that if we are happier where we are, we will end up getting to where we need to be at a much quicker pace. Continue reading

Happiness is an inside job

Happiness is what we all strive for.  But we can’t look for it outside of ourselves. If we hitch our happiness wagon to someone else’s star, disappointment is imminent.

As self-improvement guru Dale Carnegie once said, “Happiness doesn’t depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.”

The good news is that is something we have control over.  Do we feel grateful for what we have?  Passionate about what we’re doing?  Hopeful about the future? If not, what action can we personally take to make those feelings a reality?  As William Arthur Ward once said, “Happiness is an inside job.”

Author Eckhart Tolle talked about separating who you are from your thoughts about who you are.  We all have stories in our head about what our childhood was like and what we are good at and what we deserve.  They are not necessarily facts.  They are descriptions that may or may not be accurate. We might say to ourselves, “She didn’t like me because she said this or didn’t say that.”  In actuality, that person might have been having a daily struggle and you weren’t even on their radar.  It had nothing to do with you.  But our thoughts can create a forest fire out of one match.  Burning up any hopes of happiness.

Instead of letting these loose thoughts run rampant in our mind, we can focus on what is right in front of us.  Our loved ones.  The birds in the trees. The sun on our face.  Our favourite lunch.  An interesting conversation.

This is the key to happiness.  When we own our journey and don’t listen to the stories in our head that tell us all the reasons things are going wrong we can focus on all the things that are going right.  And who wouldn’t be happy about that?


Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest blogs.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Pin It on Pinterest