Poet Mary Oliver wrote:
I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers
flow in the right direction, will the earth turn
as it was taught, and if not how shall
I correct it?
Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?
Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows
can do it and I am, well,
Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,
am I going to get rheumatism,
Finally, I saw that worrying had come to nothing.
And gave it up. And took my old body
and went out into the morning,
This really spoke to me this week. As I look at photos of my three kidlets as babies, which was a handful, and seemingly a hundred, years ago, I wonder, ‘Did I do enough? Did I miss anything important? Did I make the right choices when it came to splitting my time between my soul and my little ones?’
Now that they are teens and young adults, I see them working, studying, finding their passions, and growing their friendships. There is rarely a meal with everyone at the table. Game nights and movies are saved for special occasions. But they are thriving, and that feeds oxygen into my tired veins.
So, I will let go of any worries, and as Mary recommended, I will take my old body out into the morning and sing.