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Words to inspire the belief that we have all we need to be the change we wish to see.

Tag: Comfort

The trajectory of our lives

When my now 16-year-old middle child was just 7 weeks, I joined an adult Irish dance team for some exercise and adult time.  Little did I know that such a small decision would change the trajectory of our lives.

Our adult team ended up competing numerous times at the Eastern Canadian Championships and even placed second at the North American Championships.  I met some lovely women and realized I could do things I never thought I could do before.

And because of this journey, I ended up registering my first-born son, and then his brother and then their sister to take Irish dance.  It may not have been on my radar if I wasn’t already immersed in that world.  One beginner class led to years competing nationally and internationally. Continue reading

The hero and the coward

In a Tim Ferriss podcast where he discusses highlights from his book Tools of Titans, he touches on courage.  He mentions Cus D’Amato who coached Mike Tyson in the years before he became the youngest heavyweight champion of the world.  Cus said, “The hero and the coward both feel the same thing, but the hero uses his fear, projects it onto his opponent, while the coward runs.  It’s the same thing, fear, but it’s what you do with it that matters.”

Brené Brown talks about us having to choose courage or comfort.  We cannot have both.  And by having uncomfortable conversations we can grow and change the world around us.  In fact, Tim Ferriss says, “A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.”

Brené is also well known for sharing President Theodore Roosevelt’s words when he said, “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

The person in the arena.  The person with the courage to try.  The person who knows that they may fail but takes action anyway.

Are we choosing courage or comfort?  In our family, our work, the way we think about things that are happening in society.  In the story we tell ourselves about ourselves.  Do we toe the line or question if things could be different?

We all have fear.  And we also all have it in us to be the hero of our own story.  Are we willing to use our fear as fuel and fly?

 

© 2023 Siobhan Kelleher Kukolic

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